Tomorrows the big day

I went to the University Hospital today in Frankfurt to meet the wonderful Dr. Thomas Vogl. After a night with no sleep and plenty of worry I arrives at the hospital for yet another MRI and more Contrast dye. 3 hours later I sat across from one of the most honest and intelligent people I have even met. Within minutes my mind was at ease and I knew that I was doing the right thing. My surgery tomorrow has a 50/50 chance of working for me, a 50/50 chance of making symptoms such as my fatigue, numbness and visual disturbances go away. It has a completely unknown chance of preventing the progession of my MS. As most of you know I am a planner, an organizer and a calculated risk taker. Tomorrow has no guarentees, no promises and no know future effect. The Jessica from 8 months ago would never have walked into this situation because it requires faith and belief. I have always argued that just believing in something is not enough, that there has to be proof and facts to back it up. Yet tomorrow I walk in having faith that I will be ok and believing that the proof that the procedure works will come. So if nothing else comes from my surgery then I have still grown and allowed myself to trust my gut that little bit more